Friday, November 13, 2015

6 Things I am Learning in 6 Years of Marriage

Troy and I got married on Friday, November 13, 2009. Here are 6 quick things I have learned (and am still learning) about marriage since then.

1) Marriage is not 50/50. It's 100/100. We both have to give it our all. We cannot short change each other. Yes, we are partners, but we are partners giving it everything we have and striving for more.

2) I am not the same person I was six years ago. And neither is Troy. Am I perfect? Not even close.  Am I better than I was? Absolutely. Troy continually helps me be a better person: a better wife, friend, mom, and most importantly, Christ follower.

3) We never stop growing in our love for each other.  Six years may not sound like a long time compared to a couple married 16 or 26 years, but I have learned that our love has blossomed and grown immeasurably. We have grown spiritually, relationally, sexually (oh yeah, I said it.)... in every way. That's one of my favorite parts of marriage - growing deeper.

4) I'm learning to get better at forgiving. I heard a quote that said that a great marriage is made up of two great forgivers. Troy is the BEST example of it. Which is crazy because I am probably the worst example of it. He is constantly giving me grace and time.

5) The Word of God has got to be our guide. It just has to be.

6) Troy is still my favorite. No matter what has happened, his voice is still the sweetest sound. His face is still my favorite sight. I never tire of being with him and I will work my hardest to see that that never changes.

I love you, Troy! Thanks for choosing me.

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Why We Are Waiting - Part 2

This is a follow up post to Why We Are Waiting which you can read here if you haven't read it yet.

To sum up my last blog post...
Troy and I decided to wait until our baby emerged from the womb to know his/her gender.

Fast forward five months after our little one came into the world and we are at present day. On September 17th, 2014 at 4:42pm after twenty-four hours of labor and an hour and forty minutes of pushing, my husband announced that we had a baby boy! Judah was the cutest 5 pound, 11 ounce baby I'd ever seen.

Am I glad we waited? Absolutely.

Would I do it again? Most definitely.

On September 17th, Troy told me we had a boy and then he cut the cord. It was such an incredible experience. It was one of the greatest surprises of our lives. It was so thrilling to find out what we were having and we had a great "gender reveal party."

I am so glad we waited for a few reasons.

1) If I would have found out beforehand, I know I would have bought every little cute outfit or accessory I saw in the store. This kept me from doing that. I have bought maybe three outfits for Judah total and the rest of his wardrobe has been generously donated (a lot of that has come from my mom, a woman with a gifts love language). On the same note, what if I did find out that we were having a boy? I would have went out and bought blue this and green that. A blue nursery would have been painted maybe with a Seahawks color theme. What happens when I have a girl the next time? Do I buy all new "girl" stuff or do I put her in all of the boy stuff? I am too cheap for that. Would I have to paint our nursery pink and purple? In the words of Sweet Brown, "Ain't nobody got time for that." Our nice gray and cream nursery is already ready for the next Sowden kid, boy or girl.

2) To be perfectly honest, I wanted a girl so badly while I was pregnant. EVERYONE told me I was having a girl. I was carrying high so I must be having a girl. The baby's heart rate was high so, of course, I was having a girl. Everyone said it and I wanted it to be true. Towards the end of my pregnancy, I started to think there was a boy in there. If I would have found out at the traditional twenty week anatomy ultrasound that I was having a boy, I would have been thrilled but let down. Can I just be real with you? I probably would have had to psych myself up the entire rest of my pregnancy knowing I was carrying a boy. But once that adorable baby boy was pushed out of my body and I saw him for the first time, I was instantly in love and couldn't have even imagined having a girl. After you see that little bundle of joy who has your DNA and your legacy attached to him, you can't think of anything else.

3) It was fun for people to guess what I was having. When you know, that thrill is not there. People were so shocked up until the last minute (ie: our delivery nurse) that we waited. The anticipation was so fun.

Troy and I have already talked about the next time we have kids, whether we have multiples or not, we want to wait to find out the gender at birth. It was kind of a rush and a feeling that can't be duplicated in any other scenario.

I am not by any means putting down anyone who chooses to find out beforehand. Go for it. It was so fun for both me and my husband that we look forward to it the next time. We felt like it was such a gift. Ironically enough, Troy got a phone call today from a couple who is pregnant and they are choosing to wait to find out because I said it was one of life's last surprises. So cool!

Regardless if you find out, babies are a blessing from the Lord and God's first command to the first married couple was to be fruitful and multiply. And with that, I have to go do the Lord's work. ;)


Edit: Since this post, I gave birth to another perfect baby on March 6, 2016. We had a sweet baby girl and we didn't know the gender beforehand. We COULDN'T wait until we found out at birth. There was so much excitement and anticipation. I'm not sure if we will have another biological child again but we will definitely continue this trend.